


Day Six: Insomnia

by OBlossom



Series: Febuwhump 2021 [6]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, FebuWhump2021, Found Family, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, IronDad and SpiderSon, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:33:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29247345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OBlossom/pseuds/OBlossom
Summary: "It may seem hard to believe, but being a 100 year old, recently deprogrammed, super soldier assassin with a metal arm and a penchant for goat herding and wearing man-buns while trying to find your place within the Avengers Initiative was not all it was cracked up to be."
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark
Series: Febuwhump 2021 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2138958
Comments: 3
Kudos: 110
Collections: febuwhump 2021





	Day Six: Insomnia

**Author's Note:**

> Happy reading!
> 
> -Colleen xo

Day 6: insomnia

It may seem hard to believe, but being a 100 year old, recently deprogrammed, super soldier assassin with a metal arm and a penchant for goat herding and wearing man-buns while trying to find your place within the Avengers Initiative was not all it was cracked up to be.

It didn’t help that said metal-armed goat herder was being thrust into society by his 100 year old, recently thawed super soldier best friend in an attempt to reintegrate them both into a society that neither had been meant to be a part of.

At least, Bucky thought to himself, they’d been lucky enough for Tony to provide them a place to live together in the Avengers Tower. Steve had been surprised that Tony had a two bedroom apartment in the tower. He’d only ever been aware of the suites provided to the individual Avengers on the residential floors but Tony had explained it easily enough. He’d tried to convince a family friend and her nephew to move into the tower too, but they’d declined and so there it was, sitting empty

Bucky had been more than surprised that Tony had made the offer of living quarters at all, what with his being the instrument behind the murders of his parent and all. It seemed that while Bucky was being rewired in Wakanda, Tony had gone through a little rewiring of his own. Truthfully, move in day had been tense, but a dozen pizzas and several pounds of wings after an afternoon of moving furniture down from Steve’s old place had helped to warm everyone up—and Pepper brought down the greatest gift basket ever later that day... though he’d sooner kill someone than confess to using the bath bombs she’d tucked inside of it.

And now, as he lay in his bed, looking for imperfections in his ceiling for the ninth night in a row, he wished for nothing more than some way to get out of his own head and into a long, peaceful slumber. He could doze, yes, and sometimes even catch a solid hour or two—but if he was lucky enough to fall asleep, he sure as hell wasn’t lucky enough to stay that way. 

Even with the help given by Shuri and the Wakandans, Bucky’s battle with insomnia wasn’t just a problem, it was a chronic issue. He’d counted sheep like his Ma used to tell him, he’d done yoga back in Wakanda and here in New York, and he’d even tried melatonin at Steve’s suggestion but all that did was give him a headache. A nurse in the med bay had suggested hypnosis when Bucky was in there to grab some painkillers for said headache— but yeah, that was a hard no.

Bucky knew it was bleeding into his waking hours, too—the exhaustion, the dizziness, even his hand had shaken as he prepared dinner the night before—and how he was snapping at everyone and everything?! Poor Steve had the patience of a saint. Bucky needed to do better.

And then Bucky noted Steve’s snores coming through the wall.

Bucky sighed. 

Rub it in, punk. Rub it in.

He dragged his hand down his face and turned his head to look at the clock on his nightstand. 1:45am.

Yup. He was done. 

With a low growl, he was up, out of bed and stalking out of the apartment. He couldn’t just lay there—it was torture! And there sure as hell was no point in accidentally waking up Steven when the common floor was just a quick elevator trip away.

Of course, the common room was empty when he arrived. A couple of lamps had been left on by whoever had been last in the space and Bucky was grateful for it. The low, warm glow was welcoming and the massive recliner set back in the corner but not too far from the massive television was calling his name. He made a quick stop in the kitchen to grab a glass of water and then headed to the cabinet set off to the side of the media center, grabbing the heaviest blanket he could find and a couple of small pillows. If he was going to be awake, he was going to be comfortable.

He settled in, tucked the pillows into all the right places and snuggled under the warm weight of the blanket. “FRIDAY?” he spoke softly, “Play something mindless... and quiet.”

The television came to life and the room filled with blue as a pod of whales swam across the screen. Bucky took a deep breath. This was nice... soothing... maybe this would work?

-–Unless someone was coming up to the common room in the elevator? 

Bucky was alert in an instant. He was certain that everyone who was supposed to be on the residential floors was already home and tucked in for the night. 

“FRIDAY, is there an Avenger in that elevator?” Bucky barked out as he jumped out of the chair and moved toward its doors. 

“There are no Avengers in the elevator, Sergeant Barnes.” FRIDAY responded.

Bucky cursed himself as he readied himself for the intruder. How could he not have him personal weapon with him when he left the safety of the apartment?! He was getting sloppy! But that didn’t matter, because he had to deal with this intruder right now—

With a tinny ding to announce its arrival, the elevator reached the floor. The door was barely open before Bucky sprang to action. He charged into the elevator car and had pinned the lone, hoodied assailant to the wall with his human forearm pressed to their throat in less than a second. “FRIDAY. Intruder alert! Lock down the tower!

Bucky could feel the locks set beneath his feet to keep the elevator from being called immediately. Emergency lights flashed red and an alarm rang through the air.

“Sergeant Barnes, I have initiated lockdown procedures but am detecting no intruders within Avengers Tower or within a 1.8 mile radius. Boss has been notified.” FRIDAY relayed.

Something was obviously wrong with Tony’s tech if it wasn’t seeing what was right in front of him. 

Strong hands fought against the pressure being placed against their windpipe, pulling and clawing and scratching to catch a breath.

“S-g B—“ was all whoever this was could get out, but Bucky wasn’t going to give any leeway. They’d made it this far into the tower without detection and he wasn’t going to let anyone invade his home.

A flurry of footsteps could be heard in the stairwell and within seconds, Tony, Natasha, Sam, and Steve had all converged on the floor. 

“What the hell is going on?!” Tony demanded as he went to the elevator doors to see what was happening. “FRIDAY said that—“ Tony caught a glimpse of the scene. “Oh, shit! Pete!” Tony rushed in and pulled a now very confused Bucky off of the mystery figure. 

Pete? Wasn’t Pete the name of...?

The figure fell to the ground, gasping and choking for air. Tony caught him and slowed his descent.

Bucky reeled back in horror. This was Tony’s intern! “Oh, no,” he whispered to himself. “no-no-no-no-no-no-no—“ 

Someone was pulling him out of the elevator, “C’mon, Buck. Give them some room.”

As Bucky cleared the doors, Tony started barking commands all while tending to the nearly unconscious boy. “FRIDAY, end lockdown—Security clearance level Alpha-1-1-9-Charlie!” The siren stopped blaring and the red light fell away. “Unlock the Green Room. Give Bruce the all clear and have him meet us in the med bay. Get us to medical now, FRI!”

Elevator doors closed. The familiar hum of the elevator mocked Bucky as he stood there watching numbers travel upward and then come to a stop. He could imagine the medical staff rushing to help. He could imagine how terrified the boy was—The world tilted. Bucky dropped to his knees, and vomited up the glass of water he’d drank only minutes before. 

He’d almost killed the boy.

Two sets of arms helped him to stand and dragged him to one of the couches. He was gasping for air—was this what it felt like for him? For Peter? Hands helped him settle on the seat. He grunted a, “gonna—“ and leaned forward to vomit again. A garbage pail was thrust in front of him and he heaved up the last of his stomach contents.

A hand rubbed soothingly at this back—Steve. He leaned into him... or maybe collapsed into him? He didn’t know, but he hadn’t meant to do it. He’d never hurt someone like that without—“Stevie. I di’nt know. I swear.” He gasped.

“I know, Bucky. I know.” Steve whispered.

The other set of hands came into view. Sam, Bucky registered.

“Bucky, I’m just gonna check your pulse really quick, alright Buddy? You’re looking kinda shitty and I wanna make sure you’re okay.”

Bucky closed his eyes and nodded.

The room got quiet. Sam whispered something to Natasha and the garbage pail brushed against his legs as it was whisked away.

He was so tired.

Something tightened around his arm and he startled, eyes flying open and rising up from the couch to see what was happening. But—when had he laid down? “Wha--?”

A hand pressed back and Bucky let himself fall back against the pillow, dizzy. “Easy, Bucky. Let Sam do this. You’re okay.” Steve calmed him.

An alarm sounded from beside him. 

“Nat, could you go get some OJ and a straw for Bucky, here?” Sam asked.

“Of course,” she replied. 

Bucky turned his head in time to see her walk toward the kitchen. Once he’d figured out what was going on with her, he looked at Sam sitting on the coffee table across from him, confused.

“I need to ask,” Sam looked unimpressed. “Why the hell didn’t you say anything about how bad your insomnia was?!” He pulled off the cuff and tossed it onto the cart of medical machinery behind him.

“It’s not that—“

Sam was having none of it. “If you try to convince me, in this moment, that this is not bad, then I am going to have words with you, and you do not want that, man.” 

So Bucky said nothing.

Natasha came back a minute later and handed the juice to Sam. They seemed to have a silent conversation between them and Natasha nodded. She looked down at Bucky and smiled small, “Feel better, Barnes.” She headed to the stairwell and disappeared.

Bucky moved to get up again, not enjoying feeling so vulnerable lying on the couch. 

Sam stopped him this time.

“You will keep your blood pressure dropping ass on that couch with your feet up until I tell you.”

His feet were up? 

Sam moved to kneel beside him. “Just let me help you up a bit and then you can have some of this orange juice that Nat grabbed for you, okay?” He didn’t wait for an answer, but nodded in affirmation anyways, “Okay.”

Sam had officially gone into field medic mode. Great.

Bucky closed his eyes again. He couldn’t bear to have people seeing him so weak.

Sam worked his arm around Bucky’s shoulder and supported him as he came up.

“Drink, buddy, it’ll make you feel better.” Sam held the cup up for him, the straw coming up to his lips. “Just take sips, Bucky. You’ve got this.”

Bucky did as he was told, then pulled himself away from Sam and looked over to Steve. “How’s the kid? Is he okay?”

“We haven’t gotten any information yet,” he replied and then looked between him and Sam. “If you want, I can run up and see if I can get an update?”

Bucky wanted an update badly so he nodded yes, “... um, Can you tell Tony that I’m so, so sorry.” Bucky cleared his throat. “Tell him I didn’t mean it, please?”

“You bet, Buck,” Steve came up to him from behind the couch and gave his shoulder a squeeze. “I’ll explain everything.” Steve disappeared into the stairwell, too.

And then it was just Bucky and Sam.

It was a few minutes before Bucky broke the silence. “I, uh, think I’m feeling well enough to sit up now.”

Sam rolled his eyes and turned to grab the blood pressure cart off of the cart. “So you have a medical degree now? Field medic training?” Sam snapped back. “You will get up when I tell you to and not a second before. Do you copy, Sergeant?”

Bucky frowned and nodded. “Yeah, I copy.”

“Good, now hang on while I check this shit out.” Sam placed the cuff around Bucky’s flesh arm again and watched it inflate as he got up to seat himself back on the coffee table. 

It eventually beeped, but no alarms sounded so Bucky figured it was a win, so he moved his feet off of the pillows.

“No. You will stay right where you are. Do not move.” Sam pointed at him and removed the cuff again. 

Sam wasn’t playing games.

And Sam, Bucky had finally figured out, was pissed.

He hadn’t considered the other team mates would hate him, too.

“Sam,” Bucky started, “I’m so sorry for what happened to the kid. I don’t know what happened there. I didn’t... I should’a...”

Sam was obviously unimpressed. “You think I’m mad at you about what happened to the kid.”

Sam made it sound like Bucky had missed something, so Bucky tried to get a better read.

“I...? Yeah? Why wouldn’t you be? I messed up and I hurt an...” He almost choked on the word. “He’s innocent, and just a kid and I...” Bucky whispered the last part. “He must’a been so scared.”

Sam simply stared for a few seconds and then jumped right in. “Yes, he must’ve been scared. Absolutely, but you are obviously not firing on all cylinders right now, and he’s getting help so—yeah. And you thought you were protecting your team, and I’m not ever gonna fault you for that.” 

“But—“

“Nope. I’m not mad about that.”

“Then what?” Bucky was floundering.

Sam looked him square in the eye, “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you don’t know, what with you being an asshole and all.”

Yeah, Bucky was absolutely lost. 

“Let me spell it out for you, Bucky,” Sam went all in. “We are supposed to be teammates. If you are struggling, you are supposed to come to us, and you didn’t.”

oh. yeah. 

He didn’t.

If that wasn’t a kick in the teeth.

“We’ve all seen you struggling. I wondered if it was depression, myself, but everyone had a guess... and every single damned one of us was waiting to see if you’d say something.” Sam shook his head angrily, “You never came!”

Bucky stared.

“We are all coming from different places after the whole Accords thing. We worked through those differences. You’re here. Steve’s here. Tony’s here. Everyone did what they need to do. However,” Sam was getting heated, “In order for us to actually work together as a team, we need to be on the same page. That means if you feel like shit or your brain is melting out of your ear because you’re too damned exhausted, then you tell us! And then we figure it out together! You doin’ that stoic ‘suffer in silence’ shit! Man! That burns my butt!” 

Bucky didn’t know what to say.

“Are you hearing what I’m saying?” Sam finally asked.

He nodded ‘yes.’

“Good! Now, are we going to see a replay of this stupidity or do we need to make a list or something?”

“No replay. No need for a list, Sam.”

Sam stared at him—tried to gauge the truthfulness of his words, and was eventually satisfied and he gave a solid nod, “Good. ‘Cuz I’ll kick your ass if you pull this garbage again. Got it?”

Bucky just smiled and chuckled, then closed his eyes. Things were getting a little spinny again.

Sam jumped into field medic mode again. “What do ya’ say we head on up to the med bay and get you something to help you sleep tonight, huh? I’m sure they’ve got something that’ll work, even with the super serum.”

Bucky didn’t want to be a bother—definitely didn’t want to head up to the med bay while the doctor was working on the boy. No matter what Sam had said, Bucky had still screwed up and that was gonna be on him for a long time.

The elevator hummed to life again, and the doors soon opened into the common room.

Steve and Tony entered the room together. Bucky moved to sit up. This time Sam helped to steady him. 

The relief that Bucky felt when he opened his mouth to finally deliver his apology to Tony in person was palpable. “Tony, I am—“ 

Tony raised a hand to stop Bucky’s ramble. “Before you say another word, the kid is going to be fine. He’ll have some interesting bruises that I’m not looking forward to explaining to his aunt, and he’ll need to be quiet for a few days while things heal, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but aside from that...”

Bucky breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness! But—“

Tony’s hand came up again. “Nope, gotta stop you again. I have been told, and I quote, “Mr. Stark, you have to tell Mr. Sergeant Barnes the Winter Soldier, sir that I am so so sorry I startled him. Can you please get him to forgive me?” End quote—though I’m sure he’d have gone on forever if Bruce hadn’t told him to shut up.”

Bucky laughed, and the room spun a little more.

Tony’s brow furrowed as he took a good look at the man sitting tentatively on the couch. “You okay, Bucky? Steve said you weren’t feelin’ too hot.”

Bucky turned to Sam for help, so Sam spoke up, “He’s gonna head up to the med bay now that the drama’s passed.”

Steve nodded as Tony waited for more.

“Yeah, Bucky’s gonna get a little help with a little sleeping problem, and tomorrow,” Sam looked at Bucky, “Tomorrow, maybe we’ll have nice quiet day together as a team. What do you say?”

Bucky just smiled still unsure, but hopeful. “Let’s see how late I decide to sleep in tomorrow before we decide.”

**Author's Note:**

> And another one bites the dust!
> 
> Day six: done!


End file.
